Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Eraserhead's Baby Aborted? Say It Ain't So, America!

Once again, Joni Mitchell has it right.

Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got til it's gone?

Let me say this, America, I didn't like Kevin Covais, but I'm gonna miss that plucky little embryo.

As you've probably already heard, Kevin was the latest casualty on that little show I like to call "American Idol." If you haven't already heard, zip over to a little website I like to call Zap2it.com and check out the recap by my colleague Rick Porter.

It's a well accepted fact that stand-up comics, editorial cartoonists and "American Idol" recappers do their best work in environments of adversity. That is to say that as long as we have a President who bonks interns or another President who lies to the nation and can't pronounce basic words, that's good for business. As long as the vice president goes around shooting people, that's good for business. Kevin Covais, standing in front of millions of viewers blinking, lisping and bellowing is good for business. What Dick Cheney does to his hunting buddies, Kevin Covais did to music.

And now he's gone!

What am I going to do now? Make fun of Mandisa's weight? First, that's tacky. Second, Mandisa rocks. What am I going to do? Make fun of Taylor's hair? First, that's boring. Second, Taylor rocks.

Eventually, and it saddens me to admit this, I'm going to get bored with mocking Kellie and Bucky for being stupid. Then where will I be?

I guess I'm just going to have to stay in bed with my case of McPheever.

Kevin Covais, if I had a 40, I'd be pouring out just a little for you, my fetal homey.

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